Skip to content

Posts tagged ‘car’

My car is like the lost and found

So I went to the dump yesterday, and in a fit of un-me-ness, I decided to clean out my car at the same time.

I found:

– Five thousand three hundred and ninety-two napkins (Because yes, I have managed to kick my fast food habit, and now I simply love to cook.)

– a single black glove

– a towel

– seven VHS tapes I meant to take to Goodwill

– two three-foot-long wooden dowels that I got from who-knows-where and was saving for who-knows-what

– two tumblers with screw on tops and straws that can’t fall out

– a Virginia road atlas

– a recognition certificate for someone who doesn’t work for our company anymore

– the demolished frame for an obsolete recognition certificate

– a plastic fork

– a real fork

– one combination compass and magnifying glass


What are you and where did you come from?

– three jackets

– the instruction manual for my lawnmower. That I bought two summers ago.

– a bag of dirt (because you know, living in the country I can never have too much dirt)

– a pair of sneakers

– the squishy inserts I bought to make the sneakers more comfortable before I just broke down and bought new sneakers. 

– two umbrellas

– one of Louis’ blankets

– a manila folder stuffed with mail I pulled out of my PO box last October

– a bottle of Windex (wtf?)

– some flower pots I was supposed to give to my sister. Last summer.

– a new 90 count tub of disinfecting wipes (Actually, I may need those right now.)

Ironically, I was talking to a coworker next to her car last week, and I noticed how spotless it was. Not so much as a gum wrapper on the floor.

All I could think was, “How can she stand to live that way?”