My car is like the lost and found
So I went to the dump yesterday, and in a fit of un-me-ness, I decided to clean out my car at the same time.
.
I found:
– Five thousand three hundred and ninety-two napkins (Because yes, I have managed to kick my fast food habit, and now I simply love to cook.)
– a single black glove
– a towel
– seven VHS tapes I meant to take to Goodwill
– two three-foot-long wooden dowels that I got from who-knows-where and was saving for who-knows-what
– two tumblers with screw on tops and straws that can’t fall out
– a Virginia road atlas
– a recognition certificate for someone who doesn’t work for our company anymore
– the demolished frame for an obsolete recognition certificate
– a plastic fork
– a real fork
– one combination compass and magnifying glass

What are you and where did you come from?
– three jackets
– the instruction manual for my lawnmower. That I bought two summers ago.
– a bag of dirt (because you know, living in the country I can never have too much dirt)
– a pair of sneakers
– the squishy inserts I bought to make the sneakers more comfortable before I just broke down and bought new sneakers.
– two umbrellas
– one of Louis’ blankets
– a manila folder stuffed with mail I pulled out of my PO box last October
– a bottle of Windex (wtf?)
– some flower pots I was supposed to give to my sister. Last summer.
– a new 90 count tub of disinfecting wipes (Actually, I may need those right now.)
.
Ironically, I was talking to a coworker next to her car last week, and I noticed how spotless it was. Not so much as a gum wrapper on the floor.
.
All I could think was, “How can she stand to live that way?”
♦





